Freedom Writers

I liked the movie. The story is about a bunch of teenagers, or rather, gangs, struggling to make sense of their education amidst racial crises, until a new teacher brings about a wave of change. She grows them up from freedom warriors to freedom writers. Not only does the film portray a true story with touching finesse, but also reveals the power of writing. And that's the topic I am going to take liberty to write on.

A human heart is a home of many entangled feelings. Happiness. Sorrow. Love. Enlightenment. Longing. Detachment. Anger. Grudge. Acceptance. Betrayal. Shock. Pain... But we don't always express all of what we feel. While some feelings help us grow stronger and are meant for permanent citizenship in the heart, the others, on tourist visa, have power to weaken us unless we deport them back to the universe, or transform them into harmless residents. How do I do that for the feelings I know will kill the harmony of my heart? Express. How? Speak up. Do I always speak up my heart? No. Any other means to break free? Write. Will writing your heart out on a piece of paper that nobody is going to read change the situation, the people, the world? No. Then what's going to change? You.

Sounds funny, isn't it? Yes, if you have never tried it before. Remember the last time you felt loved, but could not appreciate it in open. Remember when you felt rejected, and could not comprehend why. Remember the relationship gone to pieces, unsure of what went wrong. Remember anything that made you suppress your feelings, or express in the way you won't agree to. All these might have made you weaker. The solution? Express and break free. Writing your heart out can help. The next time you think you will not be able to express yourself the way others can understand, don't attempt to lock the doors. Write down what you feel. Whatever. However. At the end, you are guaranteed to feel lighter, for what goes out, makes a way for the fresh air.

When you write, you express yourself in such detail that no speech can ever do. So when you can't speak, or there's nobody to speak to, write. Other advantages apart, writing is mostly a personal affair. Because the freedom is personal. It's from you, to you. Almost.

H-A-P-P-Y N-E-W Y-E-A-R

Here are my wishes for you for this new year.

For your personal habits (which are almost incorrigible)

May you get up early in the morning, not to thrash the alarm and go back to sleep but to enjoy the beauty of the morning. May you brush your teeth, not just look at them in the mirror and "looks ok; tomorrow." May you take bath, not just a face-wash. May you dress for work, not for the fashion show. May you have proper breakfast, not just the residues of the previous night. May you have time for good lunch-dinner, not just french fries.

For your health (now what's that?)

May your family of bills include health check-ups, gymming and anything else it takes to maintain good health, and not just phone calls, movies and food. May this year bring disappointment to your dentist, optometrist, cardiologist, podiatrist, dermatologist, gastro-enterologist, urologist, and most importantly, your psychiatrist. May you think healthy, not just look healthy. May you find yourself youthful, not just beautifool.

For your relation-ships (don't remember a steady one?)

May you find enough time to spend with your family, not just dry phone calls. May you remember to say "I love you" to your spouse, your children, your parents, and not just to your secretary or nurse. May you make more new friends, and not lose the old ones. May you show gratitude to your girlfriend/boyfriend for bearing with you. May you remember him/her whether you are in Bilimora, Bangalore or Boston. May you get the relatives who are not relative to your success or failure. May you respect your relations, not just use them.

For your career and finance (who cares?)

May you make more money this year, to pay the bills of the last year. May you show up on time for the morning meetings. May you be prepared before attending the meetings. May you know what the meeting is for before preparing for it. Most importantly, may you remember there is a meeting! May you try to understand a day's work before declaring it outrageous. May you take work-breaks in between your coffee sessions. May your boss understand your capacities, and accordingly give you minimum work. May you get promotion, without any motion in work.

There is lot more (good) to wish, but you know I am a bit lazy. So I hope these wishes make your new year rocking and rolling. If not, let me know the missing wishes so that I can include them in the next year's list. Almost.

Change

The change ticks constantly. This time around it has forced me to leave friends and family far behind (actually ahead, by timezone) and made me land in the unknown land, US. It's already two weeks here and here's how this change is hell bent on changing me.

Work. That's what I am here for (don't laugh). Unlike back in Bangalore where I used to work long hours continuously, here it's almost 9 to 5, with the liberty to work from home at will. But I have a problem with that (as usual). According to me, coming back home early from work is justified only if I have a family (or, a girl friend at least) waiting for me. None is the case here. But still I need to change. First step? Find a girl friend, may be.

Food. Ah, my favorite topic. And the most daunting too. I am already careless about my eating patterns since I left home for study and then for work. In India I at least could eat Indian, if not homely, ready food. Here I am deprived of that luxury too. Here frozen food weds microwave and creates a family of quick bytes. But still I need to change. First step? Start learning cooking, may be.

Hobbies. The wind of unwinding takes different route here. I might not have visited a single pub in India but here it's as casual as visiting a grocery store (that too I never visited). Walking used to be my favorite activity over weekends but here moving around without that four-wheeled creature seems to be impossible. But still I need to change. First step? Get a car, may be.

Money. The driver of all earthly desires. Although I needed it very badly, I never gave it a damn while in India. I was happy with whatever little I earned. Here you earn in dollars, convert into rupees while spending, and look at your dreams while saving. I am not sure if I am going to respect this. But still I need to change. First step? Learn to save, may be.

This is just a beginning. The future might have more changes in store for me than I might have imagined I would go through. But as usual, I will respect them. Almost.

Lapping It Up

Thou shalt not fall in love - I had assured myself. But every now-n-then I do. Here is the latest story.

I had started eyeing her a month back when I first spotted her. Since then she has been serenading in my dreams. Although she faced a tough competition from her other friends, she managed to make her way into my heart. I liked her. I wanted her. And finally I got her. So it was a two-way affair and now we are best buddies. Here are some of her candid features.

She has a perfect curvaceous, beautifully maintained profile (can't resist telling this :). But it’s not just the beauty that I like about her. She is smart too. She understands my signals at a speed of 1.6 GHz, pretty fast compared to other girls. I can rest assured she remembers me very well, for she maintains 256 MB of her grey cells for run-time use. Additionally, she has a 40 GB heart-disk to store all our memorable moments. And you are guaranteed to go-fida when she flaunts a 14.1-inch-wide smile. She has a great entertainment-sense too. She has special liking for CDs and DVDs. She can give me a company for 2.5 hrs non-stop without bribe. She is not homely, perfectly as I wanted. She would be happy if I took her places. In fact she will take me places once I introduce her to the world of Internet. All in all, she is a perfect companion.

And cost of this affair? Rs. 31.5 K. But did I tell you what her name is? Well, she is from the town of Acer, where people, strangely, call her Acer TravelMate 2424 NWXCi. Others know her just as a laptop. But for me, she is like a girl-friend (!), and a brand new reason to get back home early. Almost.

Where Are You?

Somebody calls me up and asks, "where are you?"; I am tempted to reply, "in your address book!" or something else, depending on who is asking. Because we have multiple levels of identity. We can be at different places for different people. Certain people would let you intrude up to certain level in their R-space - relationship. Here's my take on kind of people and where they can find you.

Rough contacts. These people will find you somewhere scribbled in their scratchpads. For them you don’t hold much significance other than ‘hi’ and ‘bye’. So more than remembering you, they forget you.

Casual contacts. For them, you hold a few days’ attention. They would oblige you with some space in their daily notes. As soon as they are done with the business, you will be dumped in their brain's dustbin.

Business contacts. You can rest assured these people will keep you at least in their e-mail address book. You enjoy their attention depending on how good (or bad) you perform in the job assigned to you. For them you are an obligation, not a necessity. Once you finish (or farce) your task and part the way, chances are high you don’t want to come back!

Friends. Depending on the level of friendship, you occupy their private space. These liberal group of species keep you in their email address book, in phone address book, in their scrapbook etc. And if you are lucky, you will be privileged to occupy some of their grey cells; they remember you.

Family. They care for you. You are not only in their heads but also in hearts. And you are assured to be there, forever.

Loved ones. This category includes all those who truly love you. A rough contact can go on to become a casual one, and may end up being your friend. And friends often become part of the family. All these people form a very important part of your life. It’s the people who love you care for you. And the one who cares, keeps you in his/her heart-disk. You enjoy a permanent storage there.

Life is too short. The journey is too long. We need the people who can keep us going. Therefore, I want to be, and to be kept, in the last category. Almost.

I-'Day'

Freedom for-all and for-ever is yet to come. That's why I don't think we celebrate the true independence; we celebrate the Independence Day. Almost.

Powerplays

Today is the 11th day me being powerless. No I am not talking about some magical powers (which I already have), but about one of the most powerful powers - electricity. You may think why on earth I would endure the power-cut for so many days. Well, we didn't pay the e-bill on time! And after that we (including my roommates) were not in a hurry to get our fuse back. Hence 11 dark days (nights, to be specific).

But I am not going to list down the miseries one goes through while being in powerless mode. Rather, I would like to throw some light on the advantages of living in dark era, for a change (well, that's +Allu). Morning - no need to wait for hot water; no more admiring myself in front of the mirror, placed strategically on the wall opposite to the tube light; no need to keep changing the radio channels to get to one good song to freshen up the morning; Noon - no fan, no sleep, leading to a good night's sleep; Night - no bedtime stories; no catching up with the world by going through the news; no excuse to get up late the next morning.

Change is the only constant. We have to get back to the bright era. But we are thinking of prolonging the transition for few more days. Reason? Independence Day dawning after few days. And we think that's the perfect time (and spirit) to enter the light from the darkness. So here's the time: 15th August 2006, 00:00 am. Let there be light. Almost.

No! No? No, Please

Ever since I started understanding English, I have been constantly entertained by its local variations. But the one which I don't enjoy, but in fact irritates me is no-ism. Some examples of Hinglish; how expert we (read: mostly female souls) are at making a lingual curry:

Chalo na!

Come no!

Kitna cute bachcha hai na?

What a cute kid, no?

Hum wahan ja rahe hai na?

We are going there, no?

But times are changing. Very soon Indian English is going to be the most widely spoken variety of English throughout the world. So I have no choice but to start enjoying this no-ism. But still, if you ask me, "this still irritates you, no?", Yes. Almost.

k.k..k...Kiran

Kiran, my friend from MCA class, got married on 11th May 2006. He was a cool dude. Loosing him was a great shock.

The celebrations started from my side when I left the office on 10th May eve to catch a flight for Ahmedabad. Once in air, I worked out a strategy on how to best spend the two-days leave from office. Came Ahmedabad and I was joined by two more cool dudes coming from Baroda; Alpesh and Munaf, again from MCA class. We started for Mehsana, where Kiran's sacrifice ceremony was to be held.

It was 12.30 am when we reached the destination. The dandiya-raas was in full swing. But the traveling was so tiring that we decided not to venture into the celebrations and refrain from giving a drunken impression. In anticipation of the fun-filled-day that would follow, we slept.

We were ready to enjoy the day to its fullest. Dance, pranks, food, masti; so much was on the menu. Excited, we got out of the house and oops, the temperature was already near 30 dc at 8 am! Refusing to give up, we set to go with the baraat. It was 10 am and above 30 dc when we reached. The worst was yet to come.

With every passing minute, the Sun shined with full glory, showering approx 40 dc in the middle of the day. And guess what happenned to our plans. Long marriage rituals, sweating heat and gulping down of cold drinks took most out of us. Shikaari khud shikaar ho gaye!

Not to mention that Kiran was not feeling any heat. We wished him a cool life ahead and left for Ahmedabad and then to Anand and then to Bilimora, ah, sweet home. South Gujarat is way cooler than North Gujarat. But still, as I neared home, for the benefit of all, I decided not to get married in summer.  Almost.

Why +Allu?

I like to sign off as +Allu. Here's why.

' Allu ' is too simple. I am not.

' –Allu ' is too less. I am not.

' *Allu ' is too much. I am not.

Hence ' +Allu '. I am. Almost.